Difficult decision

The time has come. Retirement at age 54. Had massive heart attack last June which resulted in CHF, then had v tach which required the ICD.

Last few months I have had extreme chest pain at the end of the day along with SOB. Only happens on work days. Weekends are fine. Also had instances where my heart rate went to 130 while at rest. Resting rate is usually low 60's and I can't even get it to 115 during strenuous exercise. I felt better when I went back to work last September than I do now.

Went to cardiologist who recommended I take Xanax in the a.m. Apparently because of recent weight loss and the amount of exercise I am doing, my body is physically strong so he feels Xanax would be sufficient to control the stress. I've tried therapy and done the research on stress but I am a "hot reactor" and nothing works.

I fear this chest pain (which is reduced by Nitro) is causing more damage to my heart. Made a difficult decision this weekend to retire from work. My work requires that I think quickly and I don't want to do it in a medicated state. It's a really tough decision for me as I have worked for this employer 34 years and it's been a great career but I feel I have to think about how I feel. Wish I had a different cardiologist unfortunately under the Canadian Health Care system (which I usually think is awesome) doesn't allow me to look for a new doctor.

Oh well, on to the next stage of my life. Travel and Florida here I come!!

7 Comments

retirement

by judyblue - 2014-06-01 08:06:58

Marie: I think you are making a wise decision. Yes, a very difficult one, but one that may allow a longer more comfortable life. I am only 52 and having my body give out on me was unexpected and certainly unwelcome. My job is very stressful and I believe it is actually going to shorten my life, but I do not have another financial option. Most all my colleagues are overweight and have health problems. And the majority are on Xanax and or anti depressants. I am not sure how we get this way.
Good luck with this new phase of life, and welcome to Florida!
judy

XANAX Alert!!!!!!!!

by donr - 2014-06-01 09:06:18

Marie: You are entering dangerous country taking Xanax on a daily basis.

It is a benzodiazepine med, along w/ a host of others.

All are highly addictive & EASILY addictive, to boot.

Be extremely wary of this med. It also has nasty withdrawal effects after taking it for even short periods.

The best to you in Florida - you & your husband may take the places of my wife & me. We are happily ensconced in the foothills of Nawth Jawja, enjoying some semblance of seasonal variation.

We are expat Miamians, who did not enjoy having only two seasons - Summer & New Year's Day!

Don

Dumb Me

by flutetooter - 2014-06-01 10:06:15

To Don -- I was just about to Google" Nawth Jawja" to see whereabouts in India that might be, and then opened my mouth and read it aloud ..........

Not to worry

by Marie12 - 2014-06-01 10:06:19

Donr - Not to worry about me taking Xanax. I'm making the decision to retire so I don't have to take it. I'd rather budget more carefully than to take more medication than I already do.

Judy - Shortening my life. That is exactly the way I have been feeling. Definitely changes coming to the way I live but I would rather live!

Sometimes the decisions are made for us

by Grateful Heart - 2014-06-01 11:06:45


I stayed home and raised my Sons all those years and loved every minute of it and didn't want it to end but it did. I had no choice, the decision was made.....time for a new stage in life.

The nice thing is you find they still need your advice from time to time, no matter how old they are....that's a bonus!

Since they were older now, I needed something to do and wanted to help with the family income so I started working again since I now had the time.

So I went through the same thing about 6 years ago. Suddenly, I went from being overweight (which was bad enough) to many other health issues with my heart, hip and lower back.

I pushed through it and would come home from work in tears with my hip, just trying to get up the stairs. Didn't know what was happening on the inside with my heart at the time and would do the same thing all over again the next day. It got to the point that I couldn't do my job anymore. It was very difficult to give it up but it was obvious I had no choice, the decision was made......time for a new stage in life.

It sounds like you have no choice.

Just keep active like you are, enjoy family and friends. They'll keep you busy. You plan on traveling so that is great.

Just don't break any bones, that will literally stop you in your tracks. :-)

Grateful Heart

Good way to think of it

by KAG - 2014-06-01 12:06:02

A new stage in your life. An opportunity to explore what interests you. If you're into volunteering there are endless opportunities to do that. I think you could do pretty much what ever you want and when ever you want.

I was a work-a-holic too. Worked way to many hours for to long. I think that enabled my breast cancer and probably didn't help with AV block. Way to much stress.

I retired 4 years ago and have found that I still love to do art. I would draw all the time when I was a kid. So have been taking art classes and volunteer at a local gallery. Life can be so enjoyable. It's so nice to get up an look forward to going to "work". I am still learning how to say "no", getting better at it.

So explore what you'd love to do and go do it.
Enjoy
Kathy

xanax

by dianeflock - 2014-06-02 10:06:59

xanax is a terrible medication. you can become dependent on the medication after using it for a time.
not only that it makes you very lethargic. do you really need that problem with lack of energy from a heart condition?

You know you're wired when...

Your pacemaker interferes with your electronic scale.

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