leaving a high pay high stress career

Hello all,

I have spent the last 20 something years doing software sales and sales management, before surviving arrest and v-fib in December. I realize that my new life can't handle the stresses and strains of such a high pressure lifestyle.

Is anyone in a similar position? How are you coping with the change to your life? I am thinking about going back to school to study something totally unrelated to technology, I feel like doing something like that might be a good thing to do to take my mind off the way my life has changed. Is this a good idea?

Thanks,

Stumpy.


9 Comments

stress

by Tracey_E - 2009-01-20 03:01:43

I think it's a great idea! I don't have personal experience with this, but I do have a strong opinion. :o)

My dad watched my grandfather work himself into the ground. He worked and worked and worked and put off vacations until he retired, never took the time to destress. He died of a heart attack at age 63- the year before he was to have retired.

I watched my dad not learn the lesson from grandpa. He worked and worked and worked at a stressful but high paying career. My sister and I would have preferred to have our dad around more and have less nice stuff.

My dad had some health problems about 5 yrs ago, saw the light and is taking it easy and loving life now. He still works (retired 3 times to date, his record was 6 mos before he couldn't take it anymore and started a new business, lol) but it's something he likes now and the hours don't take over his life. He's finally figured out what he missed all those years and he's making up for lost time. His personality is totally different now, also. Stress makes you cranky!

Guess what? I married a guy who has a high stress, high paying career. I can't help but laugh when my dad lectures him on cutting back to spend more time with the kids while they're young and not working himself into an early grave. I also have nightmares about his health. He's a walking heart attack risk and it terrifies me.

You only live once. Some of us thrive on stress and challenge but it's important to learn to moderate it, to find a balance between enjoying that challenge and preserving your health. Stressful living is shortening your life and imo the money just isn't worth it. You've been given a second chance, and I commend you for taking a good look at how you should live the rest of it. Good luck at finding something new and fulfilling and making the transition.

Thanks magster...

by Stumpy - 2009-01-20 04:01:25

While I have no faith to speak of (other than in my ICD, Reginald), I do much appreciate your comments. Having my second chance feels weird, but I am coming to terms with it bit by bit.

Hugs right back my dear...

Stumpy.

Precious time

by Angelie - 2009-01-20 04:01:55

Is ALWAYS worth more than money.

Isn't Tracey good at her posts? I mean, how can anyone top that reply. Kudos!

And good luck in your new endeavor,
Angelie

Yep...

by Stumpy - 2009-01-20 04:01:56

Tracey - take it from a soon to be (probably) English major, you have the knack of saying the right thing at the right time. Please bully your husband into having his cholesterol checked ASAP because you might just save his life.

Thanks Angelie. I am really looking forward to it.

Cheers,

Stumpy.

High paying job :(

by pacergirl - 2009-01-20 08:01:20

Hi Stumpy,
I walked away from a high paying design job with great benefits, medical, 401k and people who were my friends. It wasn't an easy thing to do. I found that my job was killing me slowly. Sucking the life out of me. One day the thought crossed my mind that life was too short to continue on the road I was on. I wasn't happy. I couldn't sleep. The job stress stayed with me 24 hours a day. I couldn't even read the newspaper without stressing out. I am a graphic artist and when an ad publishes with the tiniest problem, all hell breaks loose... no matter how many times it was checked by however many people. It is always the designer who gets the chewing in the lower regions.
So I walked away. left the money, security and yes the stress.
I found I needed something with "purpose" and
I have found that purpose that I needed for me.
I began my own business and I have a few clients that keep me happily busy.... but not so busy I have stress. It works for me. yeah!
So my advice to you is take a good look at where you are and then where you want to go.... no matter where that is. Take the opportunity to change your life. You won't regret it. Get ready though for some fun times filled with promise, laughter and love and happiness!
peace be with you.... pacergirl
p.s. I don't really miss the money... I certainly don't miss the stress. However I do dislike those darn phone checks!

My Solution

by bobad - 2009-01-20 09:01:20


I had a similar situation.

I decided to buy 10a of land out in the country, clear it, and build a 1.5a fishing pond. It worked out great, and I can't imagine a better stress reliever! Best of health and luck to you!

A different opion

by ElectricFrank - 2009-01-22 01:01:21

Taking your mind off unpleasant things is one of the worse things you can do. The result is that the stress is now shifted to keeping that other world at bay. So you are just as stressed. My sense is that you will find a way to make the next job just as stressful.

I was married to a therapist for 48 years and learned well from her. When Mary died about a year and a half ago I faced the loss head on and on a daily basis. I have a large picture of her over my desk where I am sitting. Many times were quite rough, but it has paid off. I feel content with life now and have no problems talking about her with friends.

By the way during my life I have worked as an engineer, fired missiles at a test range (talk about stress), sold real estate (worse), taught at a university, and finally ran my own business. I can honestly say that most of my stress in any of these occupations came from me.

Pysch 101 (:

frank

frank

by Tracey_E - 2009-01-23 06:01:18

I agree that a lot of the stress comes from how we handle it, not the job itself. However, some jobs are just plain too demanding for any one person to do, you can handle it well and still be overworked and stressed. Stress can be a positive thing rather than negative if you keep it in perspective, but it's still hard on your body. I don't see his decision as taking his mind off unpleasant things so much as redirecting his energy. We all need an outlet.

Sounds like your wife was a really special lady!

Tracey

by ElectricFrank - 2009-01-24 12:01:49

Thanks. She sure was. We were so different. I need to know the why of everything. Mary just somehow "knew" and that was sufficient.

Stress is a complex thing and the way we deal with it is so individual. The first thing Mary would do when working with a clients job stress is to ask "who are you doing it for"?

It took me a good deal of my life to realize that just because I had the ability to accomplish something, I didn't have to do it. My answer to that question was "my father".

frank

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