How I think

I thought I'd post about a recent experience that illustrates just how living with heart issues, including having a pacemaker since January, has affected the way I think--maybe some will get a chuckle. Maybe some day I won't be so dumb!

This past weekend I did not feel my best. I was fatigued, my body ached, I had digestion issues & therefore no appetite, I barely left my bed (except for frequent bathroom trips!) The whole time, I'm trying to figure out the problem: I had felt a-fib on Friday night--maybe it was worse than normal & caused some kind of reaction? I had done quite a lot of bending & lifting, mainly while washing our 60+ pound dog--maybe I pulled something or broke something in the pm? 

Finally, in a moment of clarity, I realized that not everything I feel is related to my heart. I told my husband, in a somewhat incredulous tone, "You know, I think I might just have a stomach bug!" Yep.

 


8 Comments

Thanks for sharing

by crustyg - 2021-08-09 12:10:54

It's a great piece of insight, so thanks for sharing it.

I imagine it's the same for cancer sufferers who've been told 'you're clear now' - every little odd twinge and ache becomes 'it's back.'

Hence why we encourage people to focus on moving forwards, living life to the full and focusing mental energy outside of ourselves.  Activity, family, CBT, they can all work as distractions, and suddenly you realise that you're not just existing but actually Living.  Which is great (and yes, it took me time to get there as well).

Part of us

by Persephone - 2021-08-09 12:50:57

Yes!  It's fascinating to take a step back and consider how some of us are hard-wired (to be punny) to consider the various bad outcomes of what we're going through at any given moment.  It's protective in a way because we can then be prepared if that bad outcome would actually occur, but it also must be contrasted with "maybe this is just what my emotions are telling me right now, and it's not necessarily factual".  I keep trying to remember this but it is challenging for me.  Thanks for sharing, T.

tunnel vision

by Tracey_E - 2021-08-09 13:00:31

it's so very easy to get tunnel vision! Hope you are feeling better by now. 

tunnel vision

by Old male - 2021-08-09 19:02:30

Has anyone here ever had real tunnel vision?  I'm talking about the physical kind produced by high level of adrenalin caused by sudden panic.  I was attacked many years ago by 3 men and was able to survive with no more than a torn shirt.  It was strange as my site seemed to only see the center of action and nothing else.  Certainly different.  However, the definition can fit both mental and physical situations.  

Focus

by Persephone - 2021-08-09 19:40:23

I'm sorry you were subjected to that experience, Old Male.  I know saying "i'm sorry" on my end can sound kind of hollow but wanted to let you know that your message was heard.  Yes, I've had smallish panic attacks where my vision was affected but not to the scale that you describe.  I hope you're able to heal after that bad experience.

Focus

by Old male - 2021-08-10 00:24:01

Thanks Persephone but as I said, only a torn shirt.  No injury.  A friend came to my aid and was slightly injured.  Almost 50 years ago but something one tends to remember.  Left me with a clear understanding of the term Tunnel Vision. 

Old Male: Yes and yes

by crustyg - 2021-08-10 05:47:24

Back in the day I used to run cross-country, and we always had an uphill finish. On one occasion (that our youngsters still smile about) I'd overdone it and my legs literally failed underneath me - and I lost my peripheral vision.  Fell over, got up, started to run uphill again and the same thing happened.

Talking to an ex-Para colleague in the same club, he said that he always lost his colour vision towards the end of a race.  Both examples are almost certainly due to lack of blood supply to the eyes.

For most humans, the brain/will to win gives up long before the body really needs to, but for some crazy folk the body really does give up before the brain will let go.  Special Forces recruiters are always looking for these 'crazy' types, and there are well documented examples of super-human strength under extreme pressure - mothers lifting the back of a car off a toddler, for example.

Tunnel Vision

by Marybird - 2021-08-11 22:49:44

I've had it a few times in my life as a prelude, I guess you'd say, to migraine headaches. In my experience, the peripheral vision is replaced by visual "fuzz", flickering, sort of, and you can only see a small portion in the center of your visual field. Sometimes even that is hard to see as it's full of floaters and flickering lights. What follows that is a blinding headache.

Fortunately, this has only happened to me 2-3 times in my life.

You know you're wired when...

Your kids call you Cyborg.

Member Quotes

I'm 35 and got my pacemaker a little over a year ago. It definitely is not a burden to me. In fact, I have more energy (which my husband enjoys), can do more things with my kids and have weight because of having the energy.