I am bummed out

• by Edouard
• 2019-02-06 02:50:15
• Coping
• 1228 views
• 1 comments

Hi Guys,

I had a stress test last October. I felt that I had aced it, notwithstanding a bout of post-exercise asthma (I am NOT asthmatic - I just overdid it). My cardiologist called me afterwards and asked me how I was doing - unusual for him. I said I felt fine, and that was the end of that. A couple of days ago, my GP got a hold of the report and said he wanted to see me IMMEDIATELY. He has concluded that I have angina and prescribed nitro. He wants me to see my cardiologist and insist that I get an echo and even perhaps a coronography. He seems to think that I am only a couple of steps away from a heart attack. OK. I am doing all of this and will follow up with my cardiologist.

Here's the thing: I have always felt comfortable with my SSS. As one doctor said, "If you're going to have heart disease, this is the one to have". Now, I am told that I am at risk for sudden death, or worse. I am a fatalist: everyone must die one day or the next. That being said, I really don't have anyone to lean onto. My wife freaks out at the idea that I might croak and my sisters (close to me, but living at some distance) are not much better. As a matter of fact, while my wife knows about this, I have not said a word to my sisters.Their emotions are killing me!

I am sorry to unload on you guys, but I just wanted to vent about this thing. This is about me. I do not fear death, but I do fear the guilt my loved ones are putting on me if I kick the bucket.