ready for the big day?

I don't think I am.

Back from the 6 day business trip yesterday. For three days in a row, I had to be standing, talking and moving around all day. I was doing fine. I had a minor symptom one night, but just my usual, not so serious symptom---feel some pressure on my chest, can hear people speaking but not able to respond right away, and then my face flushes when the symptom is gone. I even started to think if it's my head making it happen as I was just wondering if I really need a PM several hours prior to that.

This morning I went to my pre-op appointment. I asked again if I really need one. I saw in this club many people have more serious symptoms! I have only completely passed out 5 or 6 times in my 47 years of life (and I came back very quickly) and my heart only stopped for 6.2 seconds for the longest once when I had my monitor with me. Others were just pausing for 4 or 5 seconds...

Will my second degree type I and II AV block eventually turn into third degree block if I don't get a PM? Will the PM upset the natural rhythm of my body and make me tired easily as what is happening to other people? People say I'll feel better, but I feel good now. My symptoms sometimes don't happen at all for more than a month!

02/12 will be the big day. I have already stocked up my fridge with probably 1 month supply of Chinese food and got all the new button front clothes ready. I have a to-do list for the days before the insertion. But psychologically, I'm not ready. In fact, I got more scared now...

You guys have always been very helpful and supportive. Thank you. I want to be brave and leave encouraging messages here for new people like you. I will. But for the time being, I am thinking, probably there will be people like me, doubting the decision, so I'm writing it down. It's OK to feel scared, right?

13 Comments

You are definitely authorized to be

by donr - 2015-02-09 11:02:19

....scared outa your ever-lovin' gourd!

Anyone who tells you that they were not is either a bald-faced, pathologic liar or absolutely insane & didn't know any better. You are facing the unknown. Worse than that, you must face it alone. They roll you into a sterile OR to see a bunch of people who plan o doing unspeakable things to your one & only heart. You will be semi-conscious at best, unable to influence the action. You sound like someone who wants to & usually are in control of the situation. Everything is against you. You are NOT plowing a fallow field, it's been plowed many times before.

Nah!!!!! You don't really need that PM. You can just keep mucking along, denying that you have problems - till your heart pauses for so long that it doesn't re-start. Or supposing it ONLY pauses for 5 seconds, but you pass out while going 70 MPH down a freeway & run into a concrete bridge abutment - or perhaps a kid on a bicycle while driving down a residential street at 30 MPH.

You are lucky - you have a second degree block - a piece of cake for a PM to fix. Yes, they DO degrade into a 3rd Degree block; but whether or not they do no one can predict. Nice part of that? The PM is all ready to fix that type block, also.

Before you go any farther w/ fears of what might go wrong post - op, let me remind you that this site is home for people w/ problems. It's not where the run of the mill PM hosts congregate. There are TEN MILLION PM hosts world-wide. There are only 25,000 members of this club. Then there are a BIG bunch of us who transitioned into hosting w/o the slightest glitch. The day after i got mine, I was out working on building our house - learning what it's like for a one-armed paperhanger. My Good Wife acted as my left arm & hand. Our members are here because they could not get answers to their problems/questions. That's why WE ARE HERE! Stick w/ us, you will make it.

It's OK to feel scared. RIGHT!

You have my permission.

Donr

Scared

by Suz - 2015-02-09 11:02:45

I was scared too. Your story sounds a lot like mine, except I'm 43 and I did crash my car during a syncopal episode with my daughter in the back seat. Same symptoms and I was a nervous wreck for a couple of months after my first episode all the way up to my pacer implant. I can tell you that the stress and anxiety leading up to your implant is much worse than the actual procedure. Expect an over night stay in the hospital, which I didn't anticipate. Now that I have the pacer, I've had no more syncope and my anxiety is now down to a dull roar in the background rather than a deafening freight train coming at me several times a day. I'm glad I did it (yes, it was presented as a choice) and I'm much better mentally and physically now that it's done. Take a deep breath. It will be all on before you know it.

Third time is the charm

by Theknotguy - 2015-02-09 11:02:53

Your story mimics mine. Was very healthy (well, kinda), very active, following doctor's orders, taking meds, everything going good.

Out with the dogs on the pet trail. Went down like a stone. Called doc. He wasn't worried, I wasn't.

Out with the dogs on the pet trail again. Felt kinda faint, woke up with the dogs licking my face. Doc not worried, I'm not worried.

Out with the dogs again. Moved over 2000 pounds of wood the day before. Had just completed three miles with the dogs on the pet trail. Everything great. Turned the corner to go on the other trail. Felt kinda faint. Woke up long enough to see two bewildered dogs at the end of their leashes.

Woke up again six days later from a coma. Had PM and it took me over a year to recover.

If someone hadn't seen me go down and called for an ambulance, I wouldn't be here to tell you the story.

You've been lucky so far. The next time could be worse than mine. Trust me when I say it's no fun being dead.

Hope your PM implant goes well.

Of course it's ok to be scared

by Grateful Heart - 2015-02-09 11:02:56


I'd be worried if you weren't scared. Who likes surgery?....especially when it comes to their heart.

I found it is the waiting that is the hardest part for any surgery.

Your heart is stopping and you are passing out. You could pass out driving a car and put others in danger or simply walking in the street, pass out and get seriously hurt.

Just a few more days and it will be over. You'll be ok...we've all been there.

Grateful Heart

If you're NOT scared

by Busdriver - 2015-02-10 02:02:22

...then you just aren't getting enough blood to your brain to understand how sick you really are. A pacemaker will solve that problem.

The PM rocks!!!

by Seabreeze - 2015-02-10 04:02:40

I got mine as an emergency in Oct 2014 from fainting and flat lining....I had a temporary put in in the wee hours of the morning and my permanent one put in later that day.
Sure I still have days of not up to par, but whew think of the alternative. And yes, I still get scared.
It's just revamping your life style; kind of like a peaceful feeling.........your body tells you when to slow down. Just think of your recoup time as a relaxation of your body getting acquainted with it's new best friend-PM.
Good luck and I bet you'll look great in your new button downs!

Passing out,

by trish - 2015-02-10 04:02:51

I too received pacemaker after passing out just once on ceramic tile floor. Damaged 7 teeth and required plastic surgery to face. Getting pacemaker is scary but the alternative is much scarier. You have my prayers and best wishes. Trish

good luck

by wjs1954 - 2015-02-10 06:02:54

got mine just about a year ago, I also ONLY passed out 1/2 dozen times ; )..
everthing will go good, better days are ahead.

don't be scared!

by kmom - 2015-02-10 07:02:26

The anticipation of the unknown is the worst! RELAX and take a deep breath! We've all been thru this before! I know that's easy for us to say. but seriously it's not that big of deal (at least for the procedure) and it's a solution for your problem and a permanent fix! You will feel better --yes there are those who have complications but it's RARE! by the time I got my PM I was so excited be getting it so I could move on with my life--I know that sounds crazy but.... I actually didn't have heart block like you but rater SSS and afib which is another rhythm problem. we knew something was wrong but took a while to really figure it out. After I wore a monitor for a month I went back in on a Friday afternoon for the results and Monday I had the PM inserted. it couldn't have come fast enough! still having issues but NOT from the PM (we just need to get the afib under control) I felt so incredibly great for the first few weeks I was like supermom! Every thing will go great. A piece of advice after the procedure ask for an icepack they usually will not bring it unless asked for but it does help with both pain and swelling. for the first few days ice was my very best friend!!

again, thank you very much

by etmichelleh - 2015-02-10 08:02:58

You guys rock!

Thanks for all the encouragement and support. I went back to each of the comments and read it over and over.

Sunny, so sorry for your loss and thank you for your warm wishes.

I was very scared last night but now I'm a lot better. I'm making special Chinese chicken soup that is good for post surgery patients, cleaning the bathrooms and changing the cat litter. Got some more new clothes. :) (too much actually) Downloaded some Car Talk shows in my iphone to listen to when I'm in the hospital.

I think, no, I'm sure, I'll be good.

As soon as I can type, I'll let you know how it goes.

Michelle

Good luck to you!

by Sue H. - 2015-02-10 10:02:39

Passing out once is enough....it could have been worse than you coming right back out of it.

You are in the mindset that I think we all were before getting our pacer, the "what if's" take over our brains and our bodies react with anxiety. I had panic attacks to beat the band before the implant and then the implant itself was a piece of cake. So of course I said to myself, why was I anxious...so I kicked myself in the you know what . During the implant, they played music and tech was right there (Medtronic) reassuring me. Left hospital next day and luckily needed no adjustments after. I think tech being there made the difference as they said I didn't leave with the factory settings.

So your anxiety is perfectly normal but don't let it stop you from getting the pacemaker. Once the pacemaker is in, you can be reassured that you won't have to worry about your heart as the pacemaker will be doing it's job of watching it for you. That's the best part. I have mine 7 years and there are many times I forget I have it...even forgetting to tell an ER DR. I have one...oooops...but realized it later and let him know then. He actually laughed and said it must be doing it's job...yes it is.

Good luck to you and best wishes....stay on here after you get the pacemaker, as these people are the best for support and advice!

Magster (e.g. Sue)

Sorry to chime in late..........

by Tattoo Man - 2015-02-11 12:02:17


...............all these guys are just spot on.....

...YUP its scary...but so is falling over...

Tattoo Man

Surgery one day apart...

by ShanB - 2015-02-18 03:02:37

Hi Michelle,
I got my dual lead pacer implanted on Feb 13. I'm in total agony right now almost five days post op. I was terrified prior. I'm still terrified because I'm alone as my husband is in a nursing home permanently. I'm 41. It's all scary for sure.
I pray you are doing well. And not in as much agony as I am right now.
I fell 7 times in less than a year. Having two concussions from them.
Good luck. Message me if I can help. We had our surgeries only one day apart...
Shannon

You know you're wired when...

Your heart beats like a teenager in love.

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