Still low after 2 years....

Hello,
I haven't been on the site for a good while but feel really low at the moment and didn't know where else to go? I have my pacemaker 2 years, and mostly I go by the day without giving it much thought, I 'spose I'm just getting on with things but I keep getting very depressed, and seem to spend half the time thinking I'm going to die. I know this sounds ridiculous, it's all "retrospectively" as my Doctor put it, and he's right I should be grateful that nothing 'bad' happened and I had the pm fitted in time. But that scenario isn't sinking in with me, and I just can't shake this horrible black cloud that comes over. I did get 'happy pills' last year and they worked at the time but I don't want that to be the answer. Is anyone else feeling like this, is it normal after 2 years to be still feeling so low .... is anyone else struggling to appreciate life with a pm? I probably need councelling but couldn't afford it, sorry if I've depressed anyone else, normally (between times) I'm very positive and up beat (!) don't know what to do about all this negativity, any words of wisdom? Neat

5 Comments

Hello...

by chip - 2008-09-28 02:09:23

Hello Neat – We all feel a little low sometimes but two years seems to be a little too long for you to be down.

Please see your doctor soon and discuss your feelings with him/her. The “happy pills” as you call them may be the answer in the short term and there is certainly no negative stigma in taking medication. It’s no different then taking meds for your heart or blood pressure.

If counseling is the answer I bet there is help available through your local health department at little or no cost to you.

Life is too short to be depressed for such a long time. Please take the next step and see your doctor soon.

Live Life Well & God Bless

feeling down

by dual pacer - 2008-09-28 08:09:18

Hi Neat, just wanted to lend my support to you. follow up with your MD and ask for the "happy pills to get you over the hump. then focus on the postive things in your life and dont hang on the pm. It is there and we cant do anything about it. can you get involved with a group or check out your area for couseling/groups that assist with medical issues. make each day count!! you will start feeling better. take care I wish you the best

dual pacer

I had my own melt-down

by Gonnie - 2008-09-28 11:09:44

this weekend. Cried my eyes out Friday night and again Saturday morning. I hadn't experienced too much down time since my surgery in July but man, something hit me and the floodgates opened up. I'm normally a pretty upbeat person so don't know what happened but I railed against the whole situation to my husband. I think my outburst scared him more than the whole "You have heart failure and need this implant now" did. We all deal with these life changing events in our own way so if you need those "happy pills", we all certainly understand that. You have to do what's right for you and I hope you find some relief for your down times. Live, laugh, love...

Thanks a million ...

by Neat - 2008-09-29 04:09:07

I'm so grateful to you for 'listening' and understanding, it means so much, thank you.

I will speak to my Doctor, I think I could do with the 'help' again. I'm not on any other medication which I know is a bonus.

I have lots of positives in my life and am blessed really, and I know I should be focusing on those ~ I'm so aware that there are lots of people much worse off than myself . Just having a down period I guess.

Thanks again for advice ~ believe it or not I've given advice myself to others on this site when I was feeling much lighter than I am now, so it is within me ~ just need to find it again.

Will ask Him for his healing Angels too, thanks for that ~ Lots of love and gratitude, Neat xxxx

Hard Truth

by Coachd - 2008-10-15 01:10:18

Magster,

I hope this finds you in good spirit. The hard truth is this, we have a PM to enhance our lives (period). Remember that you are here for a purpose, live out that purpose, that's why you and I were given a second chance.

Coachd

You know you're wired when...

Lifetime warranty no longer gives peace of mind.

Member Quotes

At age 20, I will be getting a pacemaker in few weeks along with an SA node ablation. This opportunity may change a five year prognosis into a normal life span! I look forward to being a little old lady with a wicked cane!