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Hi all, I am a 32 yr year old female with a new pacemaker. i died on January 2nd, coded three times and recived a brand new security blanket in the form of a dual lead pacemaker. I used to be incredibly active and am a type A personality, but i'm really having a hard time coming to the realization that i'm not superwoman. How do I change my whole life? Even now, my dr says slow down, slow down, slow down, and i really don't want to! I had a life! Now i have stress from worrying about whether i'm pushing myself too hard. Anybody who understand where i'm coming from? i previously had no health problems i was aware of..

6 Comments

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by pete - 2009-03-17 03:03:01

Hi welcome back to the land of the living. I know when I am pushing myself too hard and so do most people, I feel tired so I take a break and have a good rest and dont start physical activities again until I feel up to it. I dont cross the line as having a pacemaker means I do need to make some allowances. However this does not and should not mean you are not leading a perfectly normal and fullfilling life. This does not mean you will do less or achieve less in any one given day, it just means you need to take care of yourself according to what your body is telling you. Nobody is a superwoman or a superman, we all have defects both seen ,unseen and undiscovered. The perfect person has yet to be born. I am sure you will adjust to your new found situation in time and will wonder why you ever let it bother you. Best wishes Peter

Security blanket

by IanMcC - 2009-03-17 04:03:35

Hi, I'm a bit older than you ,52, But I sure know what you are feeling, I found it really hard to accept that I had to have a pacer, I have been fit all my life and prided myself on how fit I was. So it comes as a shock to find that we are all human, including me. It has taken me about 2 years to come to terms with my new life (I'm a slow learner, lol), but now I find that I am just the same as I was before, only as you said, we now have a security blanket. Still think of yourself as super woman but even better "Bionic Super Woman ". We live in a modern age with mobile phones and computer this and computer that, so why shouldn't we be computer operated too, we are the new super generation. Give your body time to adjust, it will take a little time, but rest assured you will come back even stronger.
Take care and take it easy, Ian.

pushing it

by Tracey_E - 2009-03-17 06:03:25

You're not superwoman, you're bionic woman now :o)

It takes some time to wrap your head around it, but it's not the end of life as you knew it. You didn't mention why you needed the pm, but once you heal there's no reason to think you won't be fit and active again. I am much more healthy and active now and have more endurance than I ever had before I got my pm. I'm 42 now, was 27 when I got my first pm, and I feel wonderful. It takes time to adjust both mentally and physically, but you will get there.

There's pushing it so you're stressed out and exhausted, and there's pushing it so you're pleasantly busy all the time and invigorated by it. Type A's will never miraculously turn into a Type B overnight but with a bit of work you can become a healthier Type A. I runrunrun constantly, but it's all good stuff and I thrive on it. Busy isn't the same thing as stressed, though a lot of people look at my schedule and assume I must be stressed. Not so! I'd be stressed if I had to sit still too long :o)

You didn't mention what the stresses are and how our doctor wants you to slow down, but there's a wonderful book, The Feel Good Handbook by David Burns, that is full of simple, practical ways to learn to prioritize and take control of the stress in your life.

Take it easy while your body heals! There's no reason to think you can't gradually get back to a full active life again. If you have any questions please ask away.

Battery included

by uvagershwin - 2009-03-17 07:03:45

Hey!!!!! Welcome to the club(s)! :) While most of us here are bionicwoman/ man (I say most because some are family and friends), NONE of us are superwoman/ man. I know everyone else has said that so far, but that's my input. :) Original, right? Anyway, some of us (including myself) were bionic BABIES!!!!!! We've litterally lived out whole lives with limitations, subsequent hospitalizations, questions (often unanswered), and a few insecurities. So yes, even the kids here know EXACTLY where you are coming from. If you want to chat, feel free to private message me!!!!!!!! :) :) :)

a little more info and Thanks!!

by guambal - 2009-03-18 05:03:46

Caught me on a bad day obviously, but hey, isn;t that what the support is for? Sorry i was so morose, i just get really angry about it sometimes. My official diagnosis is Sick Sinus Syndrome which in my opinion is "we don't know what the h*** is wrong with you. I have had chest pain for the last 12 years, but have had so many tests run and they always said "don't worry, it's not your heart." Turns out it is. Duh! My Sinus Pause was 1 minute 15 seconds, with spontaneous return of the heartbeat at home. Then in the hospital i had three more episodes of complete asystole each longer than 30 seconds. i recieved meds and at one point CPR but no defibrillation. I brady'd down many more times before my emergency placement, but now i actually feel worse every day than i did before. I just want my energy back. I have to quit my job because my life is too full right now, and they threatened to make me quit school temporarily too. I don't know, i guess my life can still be great, just never the same. Thanks though for all the support.

Not super, just bionic!

anger and healing

by Tracey_E - 2009-03-18 06:03:57

A lot of doctors underestimate the time it takes us to heal mentally, and often the emotional healing takes a lot longer than the physical. Don't be hard on yourself for not feeling perky and thrilled to have it overnight, it's ok! Anger is perfectly normal also, though it should go away as you heal and start to feel better.

Every time your hr dropped dangerously low, your organs were starved of oxygen. It takes some time to recover from this and get your energy back again as well as recover from arresting and the surgery. It will leave you tired for a few weeks. That said, if you are excessively tired and your doctor is blaming it on your schedule rather than checking to see if you have something else going on or need your settings adjusted, it's time to get a new doctor. A lot of people have SSS and lead full, healthy lives after they get their pm- they don't need to quit school and their jobs in order to recover. Take some time off and pamper yourself, absolutely, but change their lives that drastically long term? No way, there's a piece missing from this puzzle.

Actually, bradycardia is the catch-all diagnosis for an unspecific drop in hr, SSS is pretty specific. It means your hr drops off at rest but picks up again when you are active because your sinus node isn't working the way it should.

Please vent here any time you need, either here on the board or using the private messages. There really is a light at the end of the tunnel, I promise!

You know you're wired when...

You participate in the Pacer Olympics.

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