New PM and new to this forum

• by MillieNeon
• 2008-09-20 12:09:11
• General Posting
• 1114 views
• 5 comments

So happy to find this site. I play an African drum, and was returning from a band gig, me driving, the bass player in the passenger seat. I'm a 61-year-old female. Never had heart problems.

Anyway, started feeling dizzy while driving, so I pulled over stopped the car and passed out. Bass player says I was jerking around really hard seizure like. When I came to, my back was killing me so much I didn't realize I could hardly breathe. Manage to slither across the console and passenger seat onto the concrete, then realized I couldn't breathe well. Bass player called 911.

Two days later I had a PM. My ECG AFTER in the emergency room showed my heart stopping for 30 and 40 secs. A doctor friend told me it was miracle I didn't have a stroke.

Turns out I fractured 3 vertebrae during the heart-attack seizure, even though my bones are strong. Has anyone else had this experience, of fracturing bones or a seizure with a heart attack?

I am truly grateful I didn't have a stroke. And also, my PM, which I call Thumper, I can feel it thump sometimes, the lower lead I believe. It's a Medtronic Versa . . . am just learning about the tech of all this. The Medtronic guy said that was nothing to worry about.

But every time it thumps, I'm reminded of laying on the sidewalk struggling for air and having that cosmic tea party with mortality.

Often the thumps happen while I'm caught up in some petty resentment, or beating myself up for not getting the whole laundry list of errands I constantly run in my head done. That little thump makes me stop and think how precious the moment is. And I send some forgiveness to the object of my resentment, and I say a little meditation and shine some gratitude on my heart instead of getting caught in the to do list.

If my heart chose to keep me on this planet, I want to be worthy. Want my life to be lived more consciously and with more gratitude and love.

Thanks for listening. And thanks for all your great posts. Really makes me feel less alone in all this.