encouragement

I have had a dual chamber pm for three weeks now. (dislodged wire several days after implantation which was repaired in addition).
Anyhow, it is encouraging to hear about the emotional edge many people have also experienced after getting the pm. That alone helps with the anxiety I have experienced, really, for the first time in my life - I am 59, and this all happened very suddenly. I have been in very good health beforehand, active, asymptomatic!!. No medical history to speak of. One question, do you have any suggestions to just make it easier to forget about it, and just get on with things? And about how long does it take before the anxiety resolves? I don't believe I have experienced any problems, just a little discomfort and a little readjustment with the first f/u at the EP.
So I would like to thank all of you for your honesty and your support simply by writing in here. Looking forward to further notes, also. Keep writing, folks. Thanks


12 Comments

Grieving your old heart

by VIOLIN - 2007-12-01 03:12:34

Dear Windup.
I am a dual-lead PM recipient for the last 21/2 weeks; and like you i cannot help at first to obsess about each heart beat. I am finding, however, that I no longer grieve my old heart function (...because it sucked!) and I feeling fortunate and quite blessed that I (and YOu!) now have a wonderful "back-up" system which in the olden day we wouldn't have had. We have to move on and enjoy the new system and function for what it is--a life-saving treatment. Yes, we are different, but there are many of us who would be in alot worse shape with out this little 11/2 inch piece of metal.

Best wishes, you should do well.

violin

It's OK to be anxious, for a while

by ElectricFrank - 2007-12-01 04:12:07

Give yourself a few weeks for the surgery to heal and to get used to the difference in the way you sense your heart. It is subtle, but the paced beats are different than our natural beats. How you deal with it depends on your own nature. I am more like Gary. I am 77 and got my pacer nearly 4 years ago. After dragging around for several days with a 40 pulse, I could hardly wait to get off the table when they turned it on. The next day after the surgery I walked a mile briskly and then 3 miles/day after than. It took a little adjusting on the excuse for a sling they gave me to support my arm, but I got that fixed.
Please realize though that this is just my nature and others may feel quite fearful after a pacer. It isn't just a matter of "going for it", so respect your own nature. Just realize that fear/anxiety has a major effect on heart rhythm so the more you can do to come to grips with it the better.

Maybe it's my age, but dying isn't the worse thing that could happen to me. I'm in no hurry though.

good luck,

frank

Anxious

by SMITTY - 2007-12-01 04:12:10

Hello Windup,

You have already gotten some good advice and suggestions, but since the weather has me confined to the inside I'll offer a comment on "do you have any suggestions to just make it easier to forget about it, and just get on with things?" But before I jump into that, let me go back to when and why I got my pacemaker in case there is any similarity in our experiences.

When I got my pacemaker at age 71 in the years 2000, I as under the impression I would be getting a defibrillator as that was what previous testing had shown I needed. It was a few hours after the surgery that I learned I didn't have a defib unit but I was the proud owner of a pacemaker. When I asked why I got a PM and not a defib unit, I was told the doctor determined that I had a sinus node dysfunction and a PM was what I really needed. A sinus node dysfunction was a new term for me. Now, I know what the sinus node does and I knew the definition of dysfunction. But that didn't really tell me whole heck of a lot. But I was fortunate, while my doctor may have been short on giving full explanations for what he does, he apparently was an excellent surgeon as I never had one minute of trouble from the implant.

Somewhere along the line I came to believe that my PM was an essential part of my heart function and without that PM I would be in deep trouble. Over the coming months I learned enough about how pacemakers help a heart with a sinus node dysfunction or sick sinus syndrome (I understand they are essentially the same) that I knew my PM was nothing more than an assistant for my heart, to be called on as needed. And if my PM was not available, I was not going to die; I just would not feel very well. It was then that I decided, well I have this little piece of scrap metal buried underneath my collar bone and it will help me, if it thinks it should and when it doesn't think it is needed, it will sit there like I would expect any piece of scrap metal to do.

It was at that at that point I ceased to give my PM any more consideration than I would the belt to my trousers. Of course I avoid any activity that may cause me to get a direct lick on the PM, but other than that I forget I even have one. It will soon be eight years since I got the thing and unless I feel the little lump I never know it is there. I still have heart rhythm problems and my PM helps out when it sees fit and if it doesn't think it should it does nothing and there is not a thing I can do about it. Just yesterday I was having PVCs and skip beats and my heart rate was in the low 50s most of the time for several hours, and whiles the low-set point on my PM 70, it sat there like the lump it is and did nothing. Today, every time I have checked, my heart rate is 70, so I assume it decided to go back to work.

I give that last paragraph as an example of what can happen with a PM because I, or anyone, could work themselves into a real tizzy if they thought that PM was going to keep their heart in perfect working order every minute of every day.

Now let me emphasize, what I have said applies to those of us that are NOT PM DEPENDENT. If you need your PM to stay alive, of course that is an entirely different ball game, about which I know nothing. But from what I know, few of us are PM dependent as we have what amounts to on demand pacemakers.

after a while

by phendo - 2007-12-01 06:12:10

Dear W/U
As a recipient just into my 2nd PM after 11years I can confidently say that if all goes well you will after 12-24 months forget that you even have a PM. They are amazing and certainly from my perspective allow one to lead a completely normal,energetic and happy existence
Trust me provided you're otherwise healthy you WILL be fine
best wishes Paul

Re-invent yourself

by gevans - 2007-12-01 08:12:15

Welcome to our world WU,

I never felt any anxiety whatsoever (but that's how I lived my previous lifetime - before implantation) so you may take my advice with a grain of salt. In fact, I thrive on challenges and even look for situations that are out of the ordinary (always volunteering for tests or procedures that are experimental). I don't think I have a death-wish or anything, but I just figure as long as my loved ones were taken care of I would just approach my end days with wonderment (I'm well insured and they will do fine with the emotional adjustment - knowing I'm happy with what ever comes along). My only fear is ending up in an Altzheimer's ward (like my father-in-law) or being a vegetable with tubes emerging all over me. That's precisely why I "over-do" being active. I would like nothing better than falling off a cliff while trying to glimpse something "just around the corner" or even ending up like the protagonist in Krakauer's "Into the Wild".

I've gotten way off track here. What I wanted to tell you is just re-invent yourself. Use this opportunity to make a "new" you. When you consider each day as a new beginning and focus on what you can do differently to make a positive change in yourself, your community, environment...whatever you choose - you focus all your attention and energy on that task, all worries or anxieties about an insignificant electrical device in your chest will take a back seat. Immerse yourself in living life to the fullest with what you have at your disposal at that moment and keep striving to better yourself (and in my case, have fun along the way). Ignore your device and it will go away. You have more important things to do today.

Savor every moment,

Gary

opps!

by pacergirl - 2007-12-01 10:12:24

Seems I am a little happy with the extra "e" on scar!
ha ha d ah lol at myself!
pacergirl ;-) lol

P.S. I have never said I could type! hee hee
However scars can be scary! now I am really laughing!!!!

Hello ;-)

by pacergirl - 2007-12-01 10:12:47

Hi, Windup ( love the username) I have a dule lead pacer myself. It has taken some work for me to get past the initial surprise of getting a pacer. I knew something was wrong with me for a long time before I could convince my GP that I had some issues. I have had a few problems but nothing that could not be resolved with some good support from my friends here. I was doing great with the scare the pacer and feeling good until Friday when I tried on my party dresses. That was when I learned how vain I am. I couldn't wear one of them because there was this 4 foot scar across my chest! (it was 4 feet to me) I was reduced to tears! A sobbing mess! So I did what any sefl respecting lady would do..... I went shopping and bought new dresses just a pretty, but they cover the pacer scare. So my advise to you is; things will get better. You will learn what is important to you and you will forget about the pacer most of the time.

Good luck, Pacers Rock!
pacergirl



Why Me

by bowlrbob - 2007-12-01 12:12:18

That's what I thought after getting my PM I like you had never had any medical problems. Then all of a sudden wound up with this device that keeps me alive. Well I am over it now I just had to realize there is no going back. It is what it is. it is part of me now like it or not. No sense thinking why me just enjoy every day as much as you can and be thankful such devices where invented. Bowlrbob

Hi There

by Vicki - 2007-12-01 12:12:19

Welcome to the club! I got mine in July and most times now I don't even think about it. For the first month or so I was constantly checking my pulse, worrying over the incision, and went through a lot of anxiety if my body had any little feeling that was weird. I'm doing much better now and most times forget I even have one. There are exceptions of course. Last night I was sleeping on my left side as I usually do. I felt the darned thing move or at least I thought I did. Worried me for a few seconds then I rolled over on my other side and went back to sleep. My confidence in this contraption and acceptance of it has partially come from this group. I know more and understand it more so therefore am not as anxiety ridden about having one.

Vicki

Good question

by boatman50 - 2007-12-01 12:12:30

Thats is a good question w/u. I had mine about 17 months ago and also had a redo 2 days after. Mine was an emergency and I remember thinking after that it was not so bad, thats what dying would be like! Kind of dramatic for sure. Then I started thinking I should enjoy every day I have, and thats what I try to do! In time I have gotten past the shock of getting the pm and how quick it all can change and I am very thankful for this little device in there. I did wig out the first time I went to a concert and they wanted to wand me, but I just asked for a pat down. They only asked me to show my card and that was it. So now every few months I get a phone check and a couple of times a year I go to the cardios office. I lift weights and walk and bike, and row so life is good!
Best of luck, Boatman

a year

by jessie - 2007-12-01 12:12:42

it takes what it takes. i was afraid to go to sleep at night. i was afraid i would not wake up. my dr. finally put me on antidepressants. this has helped me to sleep and i am not as anxious. i was always a pretty anxious person anyway altho no health problems. everyone is different tho and at different stages of their life. so take care windup jessie

Anxiety was my middle name!

by Carol - 2007-12-02 01:12:03

Hi, I think lots of us here have experienced some degree of anxiety initially. I was VERY anxious but that's my normal obsessive nature when it comes to health issues! Anyway, I still find myself "listening in" and counting heartbeats if I feel anything "a little weird" (I'm about 8 1/2 wks post-op) from time to time. What I'm finding though is that I actually have longer periods of time that I forget about it entirely. I think this is partly because as your body heals and your left arm, shoulder, incision, etc. starts to feel normal again, you're just not reminded about it physically as often. I too, still have rhythm problems not related to the PM but, as Smitty said it's not meant to fix those problems, for me it's also a back-up. So, hang in there too, and hopefully we'll all be anxiety free. Carol

You know you're wired when...

Titanium is your favorite metal.

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It may be the first time we've felt a normal heart rhythm in a long time, so of course it seems too fast and too strong.